And in some way, this might be the most honest I can be in a rural town in North Carolina: unfortunately, in order to make something really great: you have to be the dirty V word: vulnerable.

It’s probably abhorrent. Also, incredibly embarrassing. But also, the only way to make something incredibly awesome, and unlike most people within tech or VCs or any big business person, I’m actually talking about all of it at the same time.

There are also a lot of moments that, very unfortunately, make the cut for an idea or a reason or a style for something. That, unfortunately, might be (like me) being a “fan” or, better yet, a rejected, younger sister. That can also be (like me) thrown up on at prom. That can also be (like me) an ability and crippling fear of driving. Or, of course, (like me) a massive fan of other people’s works.

To the point where in 2023, I wrote Paul & Me (some of my online friends have tagged me or PG in so many absolutely horrific things that I, in person, would immediately reject and create a fake persona to get out of affiliation.)

And Jesus, do I want to sound smart, and, Jesus, do I want to sound like an industry plant, when sometimes it just might be someone who accidentally and, unfortunately, Made Something People Want. Even in some God Awful backstory.

There was a strong time where people wanted me to — make content. That’s awesome. Unfortunately, the kind of content people wanted was not what I wanted. I wanted to make this, and what I have in CVA. Instead, these well natured people, almost friends, wanted Comedy and Party Vlogs.

While logically, at this time, I might have been very funny and also, at this time, I was attending (half for work) a large number of parties. I knew that there was very little coming back from being the “Funny Girl.”

Funny Girls are very unfortunate. They are vulnerable but not always fortunate.

So I skipped it. I skipped an opportunity to really make a large splash as a Creator. Even passing an opportunity to get guidance from some of the, at the time, best.

That’s something I have to be okay with and - although in the year of 2024, I still am quite fine with it now, I know the VC/Tech/Creator show is happening and I probably won’t be there. Then again, with all of the interest in a founder-market fit, I don’t believe that that is how I am supposed to show up to the world online.